Monday, June 25, 2018

Pete Seeger's "Firefly"

Whilst browsing Reddit (I know, I know), I read:
Firefly is a space cowboy metaphor for the rise of the south

Rise? More like Reconstruction, only the Union is lily-white and the Confederacy is racially integrated. (The total absence of Chinese actors in FF is still one of the Eight Wonders of Hollywood, unless Sino-American rule is divided, like Niven & Pournelle’s US-Soviet CoDominium.)

Joss Whedon traffics in emotional manipulation without internal logic. Buffy seasons 2-3 were the best ones because probably the last thing Whedon "got" was high school. He's the Pete Seeger of our generation:

There is a steady flood of alien ideas being spread over the country, always carefully disguised as American.

Ah, Hiram. You could have been a hero, with just a slight attitude adjustment. Oh, well.

Consider "Heart of Gold." Consider how little time was spent thinking this stuff out in favor of mindless "white patriarchal cis-het scumlord" bigotry. What is the policy of the Companions Guild towards pregnancy? Unless contraception is mandatory and enforced, they must have some of the busiest uteri in the 'Verse.

If not, what happens to men who find out their usual girl has suddenly taken a ten month vacation? Surely some of them want those kids? Companions are expensive; surely the men who hire them are wealthy, which means many of them are also powerful. Does male birth control exist? Is the assumption that, if you knock up a girl outside of marriage (or something like a pre-nup) the male gets no control over the kid?

But just saying a guy has no legal rights doesn't eliminate all trouble. Does the Guild have no rules, or strong social mores, against handing the kids over to the dads? If they don't, then you've just set the rule, "Any baby between a Companion and client is the Companion's unless you manage to convince her otherwise. That is like setting a rule that may not be changed unless your kids whine at you really hard.

And, of course, Burgess’ immediate stooping to violence is mindless. Whatever happened to rich men buying their way out of trouble? Is this hooker really turning down her own small house in town, and regular opportunities to see her kid? If Burgess is really this violent and crazy, why bang him in the first place? Does he really have no enemies?

"Oh, look, there’s a space ship! Hey, Spreads-Her-Legs-For-Cash, why not waddle onto that ship and get off the planet controlled by the psycho-killer and have that kid somewhere else? You know, so everyone else can live through this?"

The attack? It's the worst! Any halfway decent corporal would:

  1. put Mal, Zoe and Jane in three covered foxholes, in a short arc, between the town and the brothel, close enough to mutually support;
  2. put Book, Simon or both on a hill near town to observe the enemy forces departing for the engagement, and/or
  3. launch Serenity for observation/air power;
  4. wait for Burgess’ land speeder to pass over the foxholes, then
  5. shoot the SOB in the back.
  6. And everyone flying in with him, too.
  7. Then knock over the local bank.
  8. Then run like Hell.

Because God loves him who loves his kill box.

The dumbest, greenest U.S. Army private would know their best bet is to get out of the house. And yet our lovable gang of idiots failed to use the most basic military tactics! No wonder the Browncoats lost: they deserved to.

And where is Mrs Sterile in all this? Yes, yes, I know, unFeminist Women Have No Agency. But is she really incapable of seeing how a deal between her and the hooker would advantage both? Failing that, why not pop over to the brothel for a quick visit, and when your hostess politely hands you your  cup of tea, whip out a derringer and put two bullets in that swollen belly? Now that would be a real public service announcement on the evils of prostitution.

"Girls and boys as young as twelve may begin training..." What happens if they quit at 19? Who pays for all that training? Also, I'm impressed that Islam was extinguished before they left Earth; otherwise the "Madrassa," AKA Inara's Hooker High, would have a sign, "Incoming mujahideen please use service entrance."

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